ALrights.. Today was another normal day..
I skipped the morning jog!! BAd me.. BUT ned to replace on thrus or fri de lor. faints.. lolx..
Anyways.. the lit tesst was considerably ok.. At least i didnt failed la.. hahhaz.. Did manage to read finish de book so the last few que i was jus merely crapping yet still gt one correct.. hahaz.. FUNNY!!

Lessons were quite slack today.. Lots of discussions.. oNly economics ned to copy copy and COPY!! I reli don like Ms liu's teachings!! haiaz.. BUt she's a nice person.. Jus nt so experienced ba.. hahaz.. Gonna read up myself ler.. Fac test coming up next thrus!! SCARY!! =/

Went to loyang pt to photocopy the notes for e clas.. My first job as an econs REP!! hahaz.. im like an extrem regular customer to thht bookshop le lor.. not onli e bookshop.. LOYANG POINT!! hahaz.. almost all e shop ppl seem to know me ler.. wakaka.. Went to shop n save to buy food for dinner.. hahaz!! so happy.. im coooking dinner!! WEEX!! PLAYTIME!!! lolx.

Im so tired >.< so glad tat tmr is a holiday lor!! can SLEEEPPPPPPP.. =DD
Its been long since i last call myself sleepyhead ler..hahaz..

I realyy dont understand you. What do u exactly wan me to do? Its not like im treating u badly or ignoring you or watsoever.. Why do u hav to giv me this cold tone.. I don like.. I hate it.. i hate you.... and i mean it.
sometimes, i jus wish to stop talking to u.. but i don wan to hurt you.. so i talk to u.. But instead u're hurting me.. DOTS!!
i really don noe what i've done.. Let me off!!!! argh.......

-the pain that lies in me tells no stories-

BACKIE!! =D

First of all.. i wanna thank MR. EDMUND LIM for helping me with my blog.. hahahz
THANK YOU!!!!
(sry for e late thank-ing) =)

Alrights.. China studies on sat was boring!! A waste of my time lor! haiz.. reli crappy..
And i woke up at 6am to read the notes thinking that he'll go thru and i wont be so blur.. In e end, it was jus a waste of my effort!! DOTs.. After that went TM for lunch wid mr.ong.. FREE LUNCH!! Cuz i helped him wid his olvl science.. lolx.. CAFE CARTEL!! nice nice.. After tat walked ard tm and cs.. brought home a converse carry bag.. Think its quite nice but its jus for casual use.. =D

after that leizie came my hse printed her stuff and we left our hse together..
Actualli i intended to take bus to tamp lib.. But in e end.. i took 12 wid her and we went to eat sushi at a small shop near her house.. LOL..
And i realised the difference between our friendship and the new ones im having now.. Even if i was starring at the mirror (admiring myself) =) and we didnt talked AT ALL, there wasnt any sense of awkwardness.. But now, even if its jus one min of silence, i'll panick and find some crap to talk to my new frenez..
But, its difficult to go back into e past ler.. And this kind of gathering will also get lesser de.. =/

Tired Tired!!!

Had dinner wid mummy.. Mango Fish was NICE!! haha..

ON sunday, i woke up at 8plus to start on my hw.. haiz.. im still struggling to memorise the lyrics for the two songs that we'll hav to perform on I.U night.. there's still stupid lit test tmr!! cant stand it ler.. >.< STRESSSSS~~~~ wakaka..

I suddenly realise i got nth to talk to him about ler.. And i am really tired of thinking bout wat to chat about.. Mayb like what e poem i read before ba.. The relationship has expired.. tat time when i first read it.. I felt it was so so so similar wid the r/s me and him is having..
iTs smth like, we have many things to tell each other, but we dont know how to say it and dont know should we say it.. so we decided to maintain the r/s by telling each other bout our daily lifes. However, this type of r/s will SOON expire... hehs..
And i think it is expiring ler.. I don wanna fight for anyth anymore..
I have no energy to care, to cry, to think, to dwell anymore..
Life is full of ups and downs, full of unexpecteds.. Full of sorrow..
Love is jus too superficial..
I dont know how to trust anymore anymore....... haiz..
Cousins = Siblings?? I dont know..
The difference? I dont know too..
=(

Going off for dinner.. =)

WEEX! i'm so excited now!! its one day to weekend!! Althou i have to go back on sat for china stduies lessons.. But the feeling is diffferent.. hehs.. I jus wan time to pass faster.. I wan weekend to come!!! hahaz..

We went to e gym during PE.. after tat me, mel and bhavna went to change in tat 'enclosed' area of the gym.. it was so funny.. lolx.. Really a weird place to change at..
Hmm.. maths lecture was normal.. I saw him staring at me!! We looked at each other str into e eyes.. lolx.. But its different le.. Last time we still talk. now we're jus. strangers. hehss.. He's just another passer-by...

I realised i really do hate guys.. I dont think i will get into a relationship that easily.. Guys will forever be guys.. All they think of is.. HAHAZ.. don wanna say.. i feel that getting into a r/s now is too childish.. Its beta to wait till i am older.. No matured guys around my side... I wan older than me de.. ltr end up wid OLD MAN!! =/ wakaka..
When will my prince arrive??

Tired tired... I wanna sleep!! >.<

Im starting to let go of the childhood memories le.. time will nvr turn back for me.. I don wanna live in pain thinking things can be like how it used to le.. jus hope things can remain like it is this way now.. don wanna lose contact with him agn.. haiz.. Hope its reli possible ba..

I miss my girls..
Im missing u all so so much.. =/
When wil i seee u all agn??

Today was an EXTREME boring day!! hahaz..
Econs did the stupid staple paper game..
MAths principal came to 'watch' us.. then made e lesson so uneasy.. wakaka..
China studies made me sleepy.. >.<
General Paper we end up doing service learning thingy..

went audi wid eleanor for her cl.. intended to sleep but her cl teacher was extreme strict de.. i did other stuff she also ask me keep away.. so i ended up staring into space.. =)

After lit lecture we went JURONG ISLAND!!!
Initially i was quite excited bout it.. But.. sad to sad.. its BORING too!! =/
I LEARNED NTH!!!! AND WE HAV TO DO A PROJ ON IT?? dots...

He didnt reply my msg again.. wakaka.. But i don wanna care already la.. Maybe i should take the initiative and msg ba?? But i veh scared.. I don noe what im fearing.. But.. I reli don feel comfortable.. I spent my day TRYING HARD to refrain from msging him.. But then... I FAILED!!!
hahaz.. In the end, i still msg him to ask him bout his day... oh well.. he didnt reply.. =D

Went for dinner wid parents.. I guess im already used to this weird weird relationship le ba? I don wanna shed anymore tears..
Its reli so irony that the stress and pressure i am getting is not because of STUDIES? but instead FAMILY PROBS?? hahaz..
Im so worried that one day my heart will jus stop beating and i'll jus die like tat...
If this day ever comes, may all the ppl who know me will still remember ok? LOL


- I don wanna live in this pain anymore.. can someone plese guide me and tell me wat to do??-

Emo Poem =)

Specially dedicated to me by a nice friend of mine.. =D
We were too bored during econs..

Will you be my wings and help me fly,
always by my side?
Will you be my rain and wash away my pain,
whenever i turn to you?
Will you be my chocolate and cheer me up
when im feeling down?
Will you be my coffee and wake me up
when i am sleeping in your arms?
Will you be my sun and give me life
when i want to end it all?
Will you be my muse and inspire mee
when i have no words to write?
Will you be my fire and warm me up
When i am turning blue with cold?
No matter what you say you'll be
You're just
MY
Fantasy

hmm.. Its been LONG since i last blogged?? cannot remember the exact time.. but ya.. LONG!!
hehes.. but suddenly, i feel like blogging again..
I used to hate blogger because i don like ppl to 'invade' into my privacy.. But then.. now i think im stupid to have this kind of thinking lor!! HAHA.. So ya.. here i come again!! =)

Alrights.. Talking bout my life.. I totalli hate 2007!!
I hate the life im leading.
I hate the problems im suffering.
I hate the -think-too-much-me.
I hate.
I hate.
and hate.

hahahz.. Sounds so pathetic right?? But ya.. Im not happy AT ALL!!
I don noe wat's wrong with me.. But im getting so negative..
I don feel ME!! heh..

Im missing so many ppl.. I wanna see them all daily like how i used to..
Now i finally know the feeling of missing someone even though u're msging tat person..
It seems so phycho right? But.. HAiZ... ='(
Tats wat im feeling!! lol..

JC= Fun?? NO WAY!!!!!
Its reli sad to be unable to enjoy my own life.. But.. I reli cant.. I wan to love it.. I wanna SMILE!! a REAL smile.. But, it seem like i cant do it so frequently like i used to le..
It seems like i cant rely on anyone ler.. The people i wanna rely on seem so near yet so FAR..

hmm, sch tdy was normal.. HAHA.. nothing interesting happened.. but i managed to see him thou.. but i think i jus admire him for his sports talents.. ITS NOT LOVE!! =D

So many many things that i wanna blog.. but i ned time to sort out my thinkings.. hahaz...